Author: streetmadonna

Ten months since Eddie’s passing. !. Time has been flying. Healing is happening. Today at the cemetery I talked to a very nice man who lost his beautiful 21-year-old son eight years ago. I could tell his grief journey is different than mine even though both of ours are grounded in love. I can’t say…

been having some very nice days. mostly because work has finally slowed down and I was able to log off early enough to enjoy Baseball, beer, hot weather. I did some balance training exercises because my ankles felt too wobbly to ride a skateboard. Balance is like pto…use it or lose it. Today we hopped…

Spent my mom’s birthday weekend with family. I felt so relaxed and happy and I slept so much. Also met jimmy and Steph’s new dog (tony), picked up a strawberry shortcake, ate a filet, and discussed wedding plans with two different brides. Love and stuff is in the air. Grateful for diet sabotage, fur babies,…

Seems like things won’t be getting back to normal around here for a while. But at least it’s quiet. Curfew for adult citizens is still weird to me but it’s nice to stay in. Thinking about the 2020 covid lockdown. I loved it so much and because of the timing Of it all I knew…

Turning out to be a rough year for the city of la. Been holed-up inside and staying out the way of Anti-ice protests in my dtla hood. A lot of anger and frustration on my block. makes sense, but the graffiti is wack. I was safe and All is quiet now. No choppers, booms, or…

I was even more boring today. After dinner I fell asleep while watching dodgers. Game was a snoozefest but I was super exhausted. The week is going by fast though. And one of my favorite things I learned in college (and grad school) is that the weekend starts on Thursday night. See you at mcmurphy’s…

not sure what to write about. That usually means I’m unwilling to share what’s really going on in my life for whatever reason, But not so tonight. I worked a long day and didn’t do much else, so the truth is I’m just boring. Did I even talk to anybody besides work people and my…

Nothing major to report. Just working a lot. So much that I forgot that I was going to try to be a better boss and a good leader. Not sure if good leaders are supposed to be shrugging everything off… tonight I watched ugly betty, exercised, and did my nails. Some are jagged. I’ve Been…

I just spent 80 minutes trying to finalize my Whole Foods and Bristol farms grocery carts. I bought cheese, you guys. Real, dairy cheese. A lot of decision making was necessary. this is a short work week but it feels so long. The workload is heavy too. I need a proper vacay. Where we going….

What a beautiful night. Long-time friends connected by long-time friends. With a little bit of hot biceps, laughtears, penicillin, and reminiscence in the mix. I had great experiences. Thanks to skateboarding. grateful for gerbildine, courthouse, price club, rtd (483, 76, 181), stale fish, sugar skateboards, sugar daddies. 2:04 am.

9 months since Eddie’s passing. The good times feel like they happened forever ago. One winter night we got lost in Toronto. That was one of my favorite nights because we had a nice dinner, took public transit, walked a lot, and threw snowballz. He took a picture of me holding a wad of snow—not…

my life is golden in the good and bad times. So glittery that Sometimes I forget that there are nasty people in the world literally walking right beside me on my block. Living in my building too. I’m talking racist people. Dishonest people. Dangerous people. Volatile. Bitter. Lacking love. Not sure what we can do,…

Pretty tired and not that much to report today. I’m all into probiotics again because my guts (the ones you hate and love) are on the fritz again from all the booze and late night funnin’. Do you get excited about kefir too? Thinking of the time I was hanging at the skate shop where…

i had a really good weekend. Not perfect, but close enough. I did pretty good in terms of busy vs blank calendar, socializing vs aloneness, and greens vs junk food. But these everyday battles weren’t as successful: work vs rest (I worked a bunch of hours on Sunday), booze vs water (i drank a lot…

It’s been a long week. And it ain’t over yet. Been staying busy with work. Been eating a lot of green stuff. Been watching baseball. Been shopping a bunch. Been leaving stuff around. grateful for Friday, fun plans, my coworkers, funny dogs, retainers, and rich friends. 2:04 am.

I’m tired and I have a sink full of dirty dishes. I injured my lower back somehow and couldn’t manage to do much today. I took 4 Advils. Thinking of all the times eddie swallowed a small bowl full of 8 Advils + an oxy + a morphine + his muscle relaxants. He endured so…

May 13. It’s a good day to throw 13 things away. nobody likes clutter yet there It is. Time to shut the brain off. mondays aren’t bad. I can be home alone now. Not completely alone. I am here with my fat. Besides work people, you’re the only person I talked to today. my new…

A fine Mother’s Day. I looked back on my camera roll because I couldn’t remember what eddie and i did for our moms last year. The photos made me sad; be a crocodile, don’t look back. This year I spent time with only my mom. during dinner she kept telling me to have a baby….

a mellow evening. To myself. I mostly did nothing. I exercised and watched ugly Betty. Is that show meant to make you cry? Ate cereal for dinner. Laundry. Returned a phone call—only let it ring twice lest they answered. Nothing major to report. I am doing well. I am going to watch spring baking championship….

I’ve been held captive lately, but tonight I was free to attend yena and Keith’s wedding. Yena is Eddie’s cousin, and At one point, any cousin of Eddie’s became a cousin of mine. Tonight could have been awkward though. I was seated at the family table right next to the bride’s parents. relatives who traveled…